This past week I explained one of my design patterns to someone at work. Then I explained it again. And then one more time.
Later that day, the girls left their lunch dishes on the table and the front door open. I may not have shown the same level of restraint. That made me pause. Why was I giving a mostly anonymous work colleague more patience and understanding than my own family? Had I used it all up earlier in the day? Was it because work is more public? Or that I get paid?
Those all seem like terrible excuses. It’s sometimes easy to forget that these kids are tiny people and should get the same patience and understanding as everyone else in my life. Actually, they should get more. They deserve more.
We walked in on Ally playing ‘food bank’ with her Barbies this week and it stirred up about 27 different emotions. Most involved crying either out of happiness or frustration. This is a messed up time.
Our two kids are very different. Cecilia is internalizing all this, like me, and I’m sure it will all come out in three or four years. Probably through an angsty self-penned trombone concerto. Ally is, obviously, more immediate.
Even if we are all trapped in our houses, it’s still a noisy world. Maybe even more so now. We make noise on social media. We talk on the phone. We gather on Zoom. We’re getting more emails than ever.
And the kids…are always listening.
It’s worth remembering the old saying for parents, too. Two ears…one mouth. They are always trying to tell you something. Continue Reading