Tag Archives: Mother’s Day

Scenes from Saturday + Closets & Casseroles

You could try to practice the opposite of jealousy, which is something like the concept of “mudita”:

Mudita is word from Sanskrit and Pali that has no direct translation in English. Which sort of says something in itself. Mudita means sympathetic or unselfish joy, or joy in the good fortune of others.

If you have trouble practicing mudita, you are not alone. It’s hard. I think a lot of it comes down to ego. This is where I find Allison and her basement studio so inspiring (and why I have trouble working up any anger at the mess she constantly makes). Creativity and ego cannot go together.

She sits and paints or creates in her little space because she is largely free from comparing herself to others. She is almost pathologically not jealous and that freedom makes her creativity gush out out like a geyser.

I hope she’s able to stay in that basement space as long as possible.

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Scenes from Saturday + Swans & Spaghetti

A few weeks ago both girls did their piano guild auditions. In another few weeks, they both have their dance recitals. Both things require practice and commitment. Both girls did fine at their auditions. And I’m sure they will do fine at their recital. But I had the nagging sense, in my mind, that they could have done better. They could have practiced more, worked on those rough spots more. It bothered me that they couldn’t or didn’t see this. They were happy with their performances and shrugged off any mistakes.

Why was I getting upset? Why did I care more than they did?

Which is ridiculous and mostly just me projecting my baggage onto them. I’m sure they will learn to care more as they mature but they are also kids and, I often forget, feel and interpret things differently than me. And my adult way isn’t necessarily right or more correct. A kid’s innocence shouldn’t be corrupted too early.

Maybe I should take that lesson and shrug more things off, too.

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Scenes from Saturday + Spa’s & Ma’s

The girls still have so many questions about all this. So many that I can’t really answer. Not in any satisfying way. That’s what I find so strange and disconcerting about this whole situation. There are no simple answers or precedents or plans that we can follow. Any wisdom or experience I have from being older, being the Dad, is tangential at best. It often leaves me feeling a bit adrift. Though that could just be the daily physical and mental exhaustion I constantly feel. It’s totally normal for an adult to need a nap by 10:30 a.m., right?

I know that they don’t really need any exact answers. They are really looking for assurance or some perspective that things are going to work out and get back to some semblance of normal. Or maybe they just want to hear that story about me eating the Nerf ball again. That always seems to help.

I don’t really know how to help them but I know they are watching. I don’t want to teach them anxiety and fear. Or to be selfish. Or reckless. The best I can do is teach them to be courageous. To keep going forward even when they don’t have all the answers. That’s what Mom’s and Dad’s do. Continue Reading

Mother’s Day + Annie!

Part of Cecilia’s birthday present, along with her faster-than-light pink bike, was tickets to Annie at the Wang in Boston. The fact that it was also Mother’s Day was just a happy coincidence and win-win for me.

I’m not sure why everyone we told assumed I was staying home. As if a man of my wit and wisdom couldn’t appreciate a classic Broadway musical.

Of course, I was going. I’d endured the cast recording and my children’s renditions for the past three weeks at the very least I could hear them live if only to verify that the Ally-approved lyric (sung at top volume) “bet your dollar bottom” was not, in fact, correct.

We started the day with waffles because 2 kids, careful measurements and piping hot metal couldn’t go wrong.

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Scenes from Saturday + PVDonuts

We woke up to silence yesterday. The nice, tranquil kind of silence where you lie in bed and find meaning in the bird songs outside the window.

Not the kind of silence where you wonder if your kids are setting fire to the couch.

The kids were actually away overnight at the grandparents which meant that we could wake up, drink coffee and have a companionable conversation. We did not have to have breakfast with Bob Saget and his family. 

I could get used to mornings without slapstick and a laugh track.

Here is how the rest of the day went…. Continue Reading