We are on vacation, visiting family in San Diego, and celebrating Michelle’s parent’s 50th anniversary. That’s an increasingly rare and wonderful milestone showcasing a long and successful partnership.
Michelle likes to tell the story of how my grandmother pulled her aside a few weeks before our wedding and told her in no uncertain terms that there were no divorces in her family and she didn’t intend to start now so Michelle better be sure. Either my tiny, little grandmother had a terrifying side that I never saw or she was working some powerful voodoo because 17 years after that chat, and many weddings later, there are still no divorces in my large, sprawling, extended family.
Or maybe we just all had good role models. I’m a big believer in modeling how and what you want your kids to learn. Fifty years of marriage is a heck of a strong example.
Find some good and praise it. That’s my new mantra as we pass Thanksgiving and head into December. I’m trying not to fall into the conflict and criticism trap.
As a Dad, I’m always going to have more success rewarding good behavior than punishing bad behavior. I don’t always succeed. Sometimes there’s just too much glitter on the floor and it goes to my head. I see red. But I’m trying hard not to make that my primary reaction. Parenting is a daily choice: try to inspire or cave in to disillusion. Empower or depress.
I hope my relationship with Michelle is empowering and inspiring. It’s one choice that’s been paying off for over 20 years now and based on the kid’s behavior the other night, I think maybe some of that partnership is shining through…
Warning: no cute kid pictures this week or half-hearted parenting philosophy. I will keep it brief. We are celebrating our anniversary this weekend with a quick trip up to Burlington for food, breweries, and…whatever else people do in Vermont. Hike and shop for flannel, I suppose.
It’s been 15 years if you are playing along at home and over 22 since BC’s poor technical support led a girl to knock on a dork’s door for networking and computer help. We’ve now been together longer than we were ever apart. There’s a new way to feel old.
At the end of the summer, I passed the three year anniversary of my crazy week in the hospital and subsequent Addison’s diagnosis. It came and went and I didn’t really notice until a week later. If you met me today you’d likely be surprised to learn of my condition. With some management and daily medication, things have returned pretty much to pre-diagnosis normal. Mentally, however, I find it can still get a bit rocky at times. Turns out being suddenly diagnosed with a chronic disease can mess with your mental state a bit.