Just a short post as we traveled the last few days for my Grandmother’s funeral.
No matter how you get through it, it is a draining day. I feel like one of Allison’s bun bun’s that gets tossed in every bag and car and goes unwashed for a week.
Kids can be the most wonderful distraction and reminder that it’s all a circle of love on days like yesterday.
Even though Allison is still too young to completely understand death, it was very apparent she was old enough to understand and react to grieving parents. Cecilia had a better understanding, but had a lot of questions about the process of it all. This got a little tricky when she started asking about my time in the hospital and if I was still sick. We tried to assure them that not everyone that is sick dies.
We tried to speak to both of them simply and directly and as honestly as we could. It was not easy, but we also didn’t want to create stories or use too many euphemisms. Allison, and even Cecilia, are still very literal in their thinking and we thought it might confuse them more than help them.
I think it went okay. No matter the age, it’s never an easy conversation. It will never be perfect. Mostly after the initial news, we tried to listen, talk about our memories of GG and give them opportunities to talk about how they were feeling.
Like a lot of parenting, I probably won’t know how we did for another ten years.
This is not the view you want on the way to a funeral. The day is stressful enough. We did make it eventually, but still….
You can hardly blame the girls for being excited. All day, some of their favorite people kept showing up.
I wasn’t worried about the girls and tattoos until Auntie Meg gave the girls some stamps and I saw Ally’s affinity for inking everything in site.
The later the day went, the more cousins kept showing up. Hard to stay sad or somber among these joyfully noisy distractions.
Eventually we made it back to where we started the day. We seriously might need to invest in this setup.
Ultimately, I know the girls are always watching and listening, so if I take care of myself and if I remember Grandmom, I think I’ll be doing them the most good.
Of course, ending a tough day with some chocolate is also a good choice.